Hope and Healing for Moms

Within the past year, God has really been helping me to take a genuine inventory of my emotional life. This is a topic that tends to have two polar reactions: The first is my favorite, intense interest and embracing of the deep conversation. The second makes it difficult to feel safe talking about it, and tends to be avoidance or in rare cases hostility. Even though this is the case, I want to talk a little bit about that topic here.  I have always been a very self-analytical and a somewhat perfectionistic person, tending to hold myself to basically impossible standards and by proxy expecting the same from others. While I do consider myself to be very self-aware, I also have come to see that I have glaring blind spots as well. Unfortunately, I also now realize that this has made me quite judgmental in the past. The hard part is coming out of that but seeing the aftermath and the bridges that I have burned. It is a lonely place to come out of, but thanks be to God who has broug...

Monday morning is here, and with that comes the transition from having my family together to feeling just a little torn apart. Sometimes I have to think about military wives and how  they often live without husbands for months on end so that I can gain some perspective on the challenge of being apart from my husband during the day. For some reason, when Robert leaves to go to work I feel a measure of grief and loss. My rational, logical brain tells me that it is normal, it's silly to feel sad, that he will be home in a few short hours. My heart, on the other hand, which is riddled with abandonment, rejection and trauma tries to hold on for dear life. I don't want him to leave the house, I want him to stay and keep me safe. I want to work together for common goals, side-by-side, hand in hand. I want him to shield me, to protect me from the world. But of course, he cannot. So… At least in the past… I eat. Processing these feelings today, I have begun to realize just how man...